An Australian Instagram model is revealing the unhealthy lengths she went to in order to stay thin as a warning to other would-be influencers.
Ruby Matthews candidly answered a fan who asked why she was so thin before having her children.
“I did a lot of cocaine, like a lot so basically I just smoked cigarettes, had long blacks and did coke,” Matthews told her Instagram followers on Tuesday in a since-expired question and answer session obtained by news.com.au.
“And in between, had the tapas. Like my life was tapas and cocaine” Matthews, 25, said of the meal that consists of small plates.
The confession came as fans questioned how she maintained a weight of 119 lbs.
“A lot of people never really understood like how I could eat and still be so thin. But I guess it’s pretty easy to hide an addiction,” continued Matthews, who did not immediately respond to PEOPLE’s request for comment. “Like people don’t really realize how easy it is to hide something. Whether it’s addiction, depression, anxiety.”
The model claims she is not the only one who went to these lengths to stay slim, suggesting the lifestyle was common amongst fellow models and influencers.
“I need to be careful what I’m saying here, but in the influencer industry, everyone loves the baggie,” Matthews told fans, referencing cocaine.
“That is how most physiques are maintained… that’s how my physique was maintained,” Matthews explained.
For Matthews, that lifestyle all came to an end when she found out she was pregnant. “I didn’t think I was pregnant — I was really thin and partying a lot and no one thought I would be able to fall pregnant,” Matthews said in the Instagram video.
Matthews is now a mother of two. She often shares photos of her sons Mars and Rocket on social media.
She now weighs 20 lbs. more then she did before she had children. Now that she has changed her life and her diet, Matthews says she has no desire to go back to her old days.
“What a difference 4 and a bit Years make,” Matthews wrote alongside a photo of herself looking extremely thin. “I was pretty tiny here, I actually have no desire to look like that ever again. The modeling industry is a tuff industry with the expectation of you having to look a certain way.”
“Slowly I see Smalls changes but I think it’s crazy we even use the word ‘plus size model’ like what the actual f—-! Can’t we just have models of all shapes and sizes? Thank you for all the love and support over the last 24 hours.”
If you or someone you know is in need of help, please contact the SAMHSA substance abuse helpline at 1-800-662-HELP.