"Hopefully we can all be better and learn from the dumb s--- we have all said and done," Chrissy Teigen said

By Dave Quinn
May 12, 2020 12:05 PM
Advertisement

Chrissy Teigen is closing the book on her back and forth with Alison Roman.

On Monday, the Cravings author and television personality, 34, penned a Twitter thread about her headline-making disagreement with Roman, stressing that she wants the drama between the two to come to an end.

"I don’t agree with the pile-on," Teigen wrote. "People waiting with bated breath for apologies, deciding if that apology is good, the people who say you were right and never needed to in the first place — there are so many different types in this kind of situation and to be honest, I just want it to be over."

Her words came after Roman issued a lengthy mea culpa to Teigen, as well as Marie Kondo, for her self-described "tone deaf remarks" about their respective businesses.

The New York Times food columnist, in an interview with The New Consumer, was in hot water when she slammed Teigen's cooking website for being what she perceived as a "content farm" and claimed that Kondo, 35, had "sold out." The remarks prompted Teigen to defend her brand online, noting that she doesn't farm content and calling Roman's digs "a huge bummer."

Chrissy Teigen, Alison Roman
Getty Images; Bravo

Though Teigen was hurt, she wrote on Friday that she didn't anticipate Roman would apologize.

"Thank you for this," Teigen tweeted to the star. "To be clear, it never once crossed my mind for you to apologize for what you genuinely thought! The comments stung, but they moreso stung because they came from you! It wasn’t my usual news break of some random person hating everything about me!"

"I think we are alike in so many ways," Teigen continued. "I remember the exact time I realized I wasn’t allowed to say whatever popped in my head-that I couldn’t just say things in the way that so many of my friends were saying. Before, I never really knew where I stood in the industry, in the world. Eventually, I realized that once the relatable 'snarky girl who didn’t care' became a pretty successful cookbook author and had more power in the industry, I couldn’t just say whatever the f--- I wanted. The more we grow, the more we get those wakeup calls."

She went on to note how she still thinks "some of those things," but joked that she learned not to unleash her thoughts "on my peers on super public platforms."

In fact, having to defend some of her own mistakes in the past has turned her into a better person, she said.

"I often comment about how I wish I could get away with what I used to, now, but the truth is, I don’t," wrote Teigen. "I’ve learned a f---ton from my years being watched (and read) and I can really say it makes you a better person! It makes you think about the impact of what you say/who it might hurt."

Teigen's threaded ended with praise for Roman.

"I still think you are incredibly talented. And in an industry that doesn’t really lend itself to supporting more than a handful of people at a time, I feel like all we have are each other!" she said. "And honestly, for the past few days, every time I saw a shallot I wanted to cry, but I do appreciate this and hopefully we can all be better and learn from the dumb s--- we have all said and done."

"And if anyone needs a lesson on how less is more, please look at the amazing Marie Kondo, who so very wisely didn't say s--- through any of this," Teigen laughed, in a follow-up tweet.

Marie Kondo and Chrissy Teigen
Frazer Harrison/Getty Images; Charley Gallay/Getty Images

In Roman's apology, posted to her Instagram account, she took responsibility for her words — saying that she used Teigen and Kondo's names "disparagingly to try to distinguish myself, which I absolutely do not have an excuse for."

"It was stupid, careless and insensitive," Roman said. "I need to learn, and respect, the difference between being unfiltered and honest vs. being uneducated and flippant."

She wrote in her statement, "The burden is not on them (or anyone else) to teach me, and I’m deeply sorry that my learning came at Chrissy and Marie’s expense. They’ve worked extremely hard to get to where they are and both deserve better than my tone deaf remarks."

Reflecting on her controversial comments, Roman said she wished she had chosen to "express myself without tearing someone down."

"Among the many uncomfortable things I’ve begun processing is the knowledge that my comments were rooted in my own security. My inability to appreciate my own success without comparing myself to and knocking down others — in this case two accomplished women — is something I recognize I most definitely struggle with, and am working to fix. I don’t want to be a person like that," she explained.

Roman also accepted criticism that her comments could have been perceived as racially charged, writing in her apology, "I’m not the victim here, and my insecurities don’t excuse this behavior. I’m a white woman who has and will continue to benefit from white privilege and I recognize that makes what I said even more inexcusable and hurtful."

"The fact it didn’t occur to me that I had singled out two Asian women is one hundred percent a function of my privilege (being blind to racial insensitivities is a discriminatory luxury)," she added. "I know that our culture frequently goes after women, especially women of color, and I’m ashamed to have contributed to that. I want to lift up and support women of color, my actions indicated the opposite."

In issuing a formal apology to Teigen, and Kondo, Roman said it was a way to "acknowledge that this is a part of a broader, related discourse about cultural appropriation in the food world, and who gets to be successful in this space."

"I want anyone reading who has been hurt by my actions or comments (past of present) to know that I am listening and I am sorry. I commit to being open and receptive to this conversation as it continues and to accept criticism that is coming my way and to try to do better," she wrote.

Roman's note ended with her admitting that she "messed up" and she will use this experience "as motivation to do and be better."

"It is no one’s obligation to accept my apology or to help me improve," she said, welcoming readers to "share their knowledge, guidance, or opinions" on how to "navigate these areas" by emailing her.

"I know some will use this as an opportunity to express their anger. I hope many will share advice. I will read it all," she said.