"I wanna feel chosen. A part of me is like 'You left me, so now choose me. Jump on me, you know what I mean?'" she said on her podcast

By Melody Chiu
May 29, 2018 06:15 PM
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Jana Kramer and Mike Caussin are working hard on their marriage, but one of the biggest hurdles for the couple is their sex life.

The spouses — who separated in 2016 but renewed their vows in December — sat down to discuss their intimacy issues on Kramer’s latest “Whine Down with Jana Kramer” podcast and opened up to fans about how Caussin’s cheating has affected their relationship.

“Unfortunately the infidelity piece plays a part in this,” said Kramer, 34. “There’s times I do wanna have sex, and I play the game of waiting for you to come to me ’cause I’m like ‘Well, you know, why doesn’t he want me? Why doesn’t he wanna sleep with me since he slept with someone else?'”

“Then I’m like ‘I’m not pretty enough’ and I’m insecure … and I feel rejected again,” she continued. “I get upset and you get upset.”

Caussin, 31, however, explained that he doesn’t “wanna feel tested” and added that the duo are also working on communicating their feelings to each other.

51st Academy Of Country Music Awards - Arrivals
Mike Caussin and Jana Kramer
| Credit: David Becker/Getty Images

“Especially when there is infidelity involved, communication is key. You and I have slowly gotten better at this,” he said.

The former football player also explained that sometimes he’s just tired after a long day and isn’t up for sex. However, that’s difficult for Kramer — who’s still dealing with the aftermath of his cheating — to accept at face value.

“I wanna feel chosen. A part of me is like ‘You left me, so now choose me. Jump on me, you know what I mean?'” she said.

The couple — who are parents to 2-year-old daughter Jolie — did agree that “spontaneous” sex is better than planned sex, especially because Caussin deals with anxiety when it comes to intimacy.

“If it starts to become this planning thing, then I get in my head. It’s just anxiety built up to performing,” he said. “That’s something most men won’t really admit. I never connected sex and intimacy and love together before in my life.”

Caussin also revealed he’s cheated on every single girlfriend he’s had because of his intimacy issues.

RELATED VIDEO: Jana Kramer Opens Up About How Her Daughter Has Changed Her Life

Early in their courtship, Kramer and Caussin had a “great” sex life, but then “it was like ‘What happened? Why are you not wanting to have sex with me?'” she explained. “Our sex life has been tumultuous … it’s been a work-in-progress.”

He also became “mean and short-tempered” and looked for physical relationships elsewhere. “I knew I really liked a girl when I started having issues. It was an alarm clock going off in my body … that’s why I’ve been unfaithful in every relationship I’ve ever had. It sucks,” said Caussin.

Jana Kramer's daughter Jolie's nursery.Credit: Spantman Photography
Jana Kramer, Mike Caussin and Jolie
| Credit: Spantman Photography

Kramer said it was especially hurtful when her husband cheated on her because the duo had been so open with each other about previously being unfaithful in relationships.

“I’ve cheated plenty in my past,” she admitted. “Not proud of it, but when we got together … I was like, ‘Look I’m gonna be honest … I want to be different in this relationship. I want to love you, only love you and be with you.’ What hurt was that he said the same thing.”

Despite their ongoing marital and intimacy issues, Kramer assured Caussin she was “proud” of him for working on himself.

Said the entertainer: “The fact that you even want to work on your intimacy is huge … it’s a bigger uphill battle for you.”