Including "Theodore Gooooooooaaaaallll-sevelt!"

By Alex Heigl
Updated June 23, 2014 02:20 PM
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Credit: Valery Sharifulin/Zuma Press

“Theodore Roosevelt” was trending on Google Monday morning – no, not because of a renewed wave of interest in America’s most epically masculine president, but because of this guy:

That’s Mike D’Amico, an American soccer fan who’s been dressing up as Teddy Roosevelt (or, as people have been referring to him, “Teddy Gooooooaaaal-sevelt”) for World Cup games, making himself into a rallying figure for American soccer fans everywhere. In honor of D’Amico and the rest of the World Cup‘s most, uh, “enthusiastic” fans, we’ve rounded up some of our favorites below.

Doesn’t that kid look like one of the Christ the Redeemer jerseys come to life? Isn’t that terrifying?

This is where we’d make a “Cowardly Lion” joke if we were a) Knowledgeable enough about soccer to do so in a clever way, and b) Not terrified of English soccer fans.

And here we thought the Belgians were a peaceful, waffle-and-chocolate-loving people.

The sun: A threatening mascot for pale people and polar bears.

Trolls take soccer – sorry, football – very seriously.

What’s with American sports fans and wearing foodstuffs on their heads? At least corn is slightly more intimidating than cheese … we think.

No comment. Mostly from befuddlement, but also due to deep and primal fear.

Thankfully, Brazil wasn’t one of the countries involved in the Crusades or this might have seemed somewhat tone-deaf.

As Michael Caine once said, “There’s only two things I can’t stand in this world: People who are intolerant of other people’s cultures, and the Dutch.”

If the World Cup ends without D’Amico being photographed on top of a moose, such as this classic (albeit fake) picture of Roosevelt, the whole thing will have been in vain.

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