Illustration By Debra Cartwright
March 26, 2014 05:00 PM

Aries (Mar. 21 Apr. 19)

You don’t need to be Neil deGrasse Tyson to notice the cosmos causing a teensy bit of chaos right now. Use this window before both (!) of this month s upcoming eclipses to shore up for the unexpected – and stock up on Easter candy.

Taurus (Apr. 20 May 20)

The new moon in Aries has hit the reset button on your life. (That’s a good thing.) Take the opportunity to consciously uncouple from energy-draining friends, unequal relationships, and people with toxic vibes that bring you down.

Gemini (May 21 Jun. 21)

You’ve missed your get-togethers with an uproarious crew from the past – why not pick a convenient date to get the band back together? The reunion will strengthen the bonds of your friendships, plus you could forge fun new traditions.

Cancer (Jun. 22 Jul. 22)

Justin Bieber recently finished up the tattooed sleeve on his right arm. See? Goal met. You’ve got celestial permission to set your sights high and achieve your own ambition, Cancer. The only thing standing in your way is your own trepidation.

Leo (Jul. 23 Aug. 22)

The new moon in your ninth house has rekindled your sense of adventure. Follow Madonna‘s example and don’t worry too much about what other people think (armpit hair optional). What really matters is your own happiness, Leo.

Virgo (Aug. 23 Sep. 22)

Single and coupled Virgos alike will notice a blooming of all things romance-related as the sun moves through your smooch sector. Though things may be heating up, take it slow – the stars have a turbulent April in store for you.

Libra (Sep. 23 Oct. 23)

Nothing lasts forever, Libra. Not even Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin. Precisely why now is a good time to bolster your snuggliest relationships and try to usher in new ones. Are you as present for your favorite people as you can be?

Scorpio (Oct. 24 Nov. 21)

Ramping up your healthy habits should be your focus this week, but with Mars in retrograde, you’re going to need a cheerleader. Sign up for a muscle-quivering boot camp class or order a pre-made juice cleanse and let the pros whip you into shape.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 Dec. 21)

Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis, Miss Piggy and Kermit, Kimye and Anna Wintour – the spirit of love is in the air. The Aries new moon has opened the door wide for amoré, as long as you’re ready to receive it. (Yes, even on OKCupid.)

Capricorn (Dec. 22 Jan. 19)

Spring’s sluggish debut is motivating you to spend more time at home than hanging in the garden. Use this downtime to tackle annoying domestic tasks you’ve been avoiding. You won’t want to deal with them once the weather’s gorgeous.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 Feb. 18)

If you’ve been sitting on any ideas, Aquarius, now’s the perfect time to pitch them. Your voice carries serious sway. That persuasive Girl Scout who sold over 18,000 boxes of Thin Mints and Samoas? She s got nothing on you this week.

Pisces (Feb. 19 Mar. 20)

You’ve dreamed of a tranquil week, Pisces. No dice – the stars are stirring up all sorts of drama. But just when it feels like the universe has pulled the magic carpet from underneath you, you’ll realize that all is as it should be.

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