Tallulah Willis on Seeking Treatment: 'I Became My Own Worst Critic'
The 20-year-old speaks candidly about her battle with depression in the February issue of Teen Vogue
Tallulah Willis was barely into her teens when she started to hate herself.
“A switch flipped,” Tallulah says of the moment everything changed. “I was in a New York hotel room when I was 13 looking at a photo of myself online. I broke down in tears as I started to read the comments.
“I thought, I am a hideous, disgusting-looking person. I might be nice and I might be kind, but I’m a really unattractive human being.”
Adds Tallulah: “It wasn’t about the anonymous cyberbullies – I became my own worst critic.”
The 20-year-old sought treatment for various issues, including an eating disorder, over the summer.
“In college the depression became overwhelming. I didn’t sleep or want to talk to anyone, nothing seemed to have a point, the world lost its color and food lost its taste,” she tells the magazine.
She adds: “I was so removed from my body and from my mind that it was like I was living in a cardboard replica of what life should be.”
Finally, her older sister Scout, 23, stepped in. She “forced me to see what I was doing,” Tallulah says. “I knew I needed to go take care of myself.”
She spent 45 days in treatment. “I can say that I’m getting to that place where I m starting to feel OK with myself, bit by bit,” she says.
Obviously, everything isn’t suddenly perfect, but Tallulah is excited about the prospect of breaking old patterns.
“If you’re bullied in school, should you stay home? No. You go to school in your best outfit and look like a million bucks and own it.”