Reese Calls Divorce Humilating and Isolating

"If it's not painful, maybe it wasn't the right decision to marry to begin with," the actress says

At Reese Witherspoon‘s low point after her very public divorce from Ryan Phillippe, the actress found some efforts to console her far from helpful.

“When people get in your face and say, ‘This will pass,’ you think: Are they crazy?” Witherspooon, 32, tells the April issue of Elle. “I’m never gonna feel any better than I feel right this minute and nothing’s ever gonna make sense again. And I still have moments where I’m like, Nothing’s ever gonna make sense again.”

But while she calls the split “very humiliating and very isolating,” Witherspoon came to realize, “If it’s not painful, maybe it wasn’t the right decision to marry to begin with. Those are the appropriate emotions.”

So, she says, is falling into the “blame game.”

“Blame, blame, blame,” she says. “You know? And it’s a really easy thing to do, and I’m certainly guilty of it. [You have to] look at yourself and go: ‘What part of this do I need to own? Which part of this is my responsibility?’ And that’s the painful work that you have to go through to hopefully get some real life knowledge out of it.”

And the experience didn’t leave her sour on love. Witherspooon, who has two children with Phillippe, 34, is now in a relationship with actor Jack Gyllenhaal, 28. ” He’s fabulous,” she says. “He really is a fantastic guy.”

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