Ellen DeGeneres's 5 Best Oscar Monologue Barbs

The warm and fuzzy host took her claws out in her monologue

Photo: Kevin Winter/Getty

Ellen DeGeneres is generally thought of as the anti-Ricky Gervais. She’s a friendly, inoffensive choice to host an awards show, who is sure to leave everyone with warm and fuzzy feelings … right?


In her opening monologue at Sunday night’s Academy Awards, Ellen bared her claws, leaving no nominee unspared. The mood may have been a little sharper than Oscar producers expected, but there’s no denying that Ellen gave one of the better Oscar monologues in recent memory.

Below, the host’s best zingers, ranked.

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5. To Liza Minnellii: “Hello to the best Liza Minnelli impersonator I’ve ever seen. Good job, sir!”

4. On the Oscars’ resemblance to a recent box-office smash: “There are cameras everywhere, you’re starving, Jennifer Lawrence won – it’s The Hunger Games!”

3. After running down the lineage of Bruce Dern, whose grandfather was governor of Utah, whose great-uncle was a renowned poet, and whose godmother was Eleanor Roosevelt: “What happened?”

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2. To Jennifer Lawrence, whose award-winning fall at the 2013 Oscars was the subject of an extended riff: “If you win, we should bring you the Oscar.”

1. On the night’s biggest race: “There are so many different possibilities. Possibility no. 1, 12 Years a Slave wins Best Picture. Possibility no. 2: You’re all racist.”

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