'I Am Still in So Much Pain:' Lady Gaga Talks About Her Rape, Says 'It Made Me Question Everything'

Lady Gaga spoke candidly about the experience that inspired "Til It Happens to You"

Photo: Richard Shotwell/Invision/AP

Lady Gaga is still coming to terms with the sexual assault that she says made her “question everything.”

In The Hollywood Reporter‘s podcast, “Awards Chatter,” the singer spoke candidly about her emotional songTil It Happens to You” and the horrific experience that inspired the hit.

“The person that I’m singing to is the person that wants to heal me – I’m telling them they can’t,” she said of the song. “I am so sick of people walking in and out of my life, telling me that I’m gonna be okay, because I am still in so much pain that you can’t understand.”

Gaga worked alongside Diane Warren to write and record the song for The Hunting Ground, a documentary about rape on college campuses. The project holds personal significance for Gaga, who revealed in 2014 that she was raped at the age of 19.

The “Bad Romance” singer, 29, said in the podcast that the experience left her questioning herself, noting that she “was already Lady Gaga” when she was sexually assaulted by someone she knew.

“It’s something that changed me forever, and it made me question everything about what I had done to be where I am today,” she said. “I thought to myself, ‘Did I do something wrong to bring this on myself? What did I do?’ ”

“I choose to wear these clothes, and I choose to dress this way and sing about sex, and you wonder if you’re implying to people that it’s okay,” Gaga said, leading Warren to stress that nothing justifies sexual assault.

The song has proven to be an emotional project for Gaga, who described the track as “beautiful.”

“Every time I sing that song it’s difficult for me,” she said.

Warren chimed in: “But it’s healing people.”

Gaga explained that working with Warren – who said she was molested at the age of 12 – on the song was empowering for both of the artists.

“It became two women together, standing strong.”

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