Jennifer Lopez: How I Balance My Relationship with Ex Marc Anthony and Boyfriend Beau 'Casper' Smart

"My relationship with them [is] always in reference to the kids," the star tells PEOPLE exclusively

Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images for InStyle; John Shearer/WireImage

Whether it’s acting, singing or nurturing a budding star’s career, it seems like there’s nothing Jennifer Lopez can’t do.

But even with her schedule packed to the brim, the star’s priority remains creating a nurturing environment for her 8-year-old twins Max and Emme with her ex-husband Marc Anthony and boyfriend Beau “Casper” Smart.

Balancing her modern family “is a full-time job,” Lopez – who’s currently starring in NBC’s hit show Shades of Blue, judging on American Idol and performing in Las Vegas for her residency – says in The Jess Cagle Interview with People and Entertainment Weekly‘s editorial director. “It’s my first job to do that, to make sure that’s okay or else I couldn’t do all the other things I do.”

Watch more of The Jess Cagle Interview with Jennifer Lopez on all this week.

According to the actress, 46, both Anthony and Smart are “a big part” of maintaining a happy home for her twins.

“My relationship with them, our references are always in reference to the kids. What’s best for them, what’s good for them, let’s talk this way in front of them … You know what I mean? Once they’re happy, they just add happiness and joy into the home and then everything else kind of goes from there.”

For more on Jennifer Lopez’s gritty new show and her happy life now, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday.

Max and Emme have also become accustomed to mom’s jet-setting lifestyle and “adapt very well to everything,” says Lopez.

Adds the star: “I just try to give them all the extra love I can so they always feel … no matter where we are or what’s happening or how much mommy’s working, we’re safe. We’re good.”

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