November 18, 2015 10:45 AM

James Corden vows to be People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive … someday.

In a hilarious, brutally honest, essay in this week’s issue of PEOPLE, the host of The Late Late Show voices his strategic plan for following through on the promise.

“The truth is I m sure I should do a little more of the working out,” Corden, 37, writes. “But this is all part of my plan to peak when I m 40. Granted, I am only three years away from that now, so I really need to start putting broccoli in my mouth.”

James Corden
Rich Fury/Invision/AP

He adds, “The problem with me is I forget what I look like. In my head I look a lot hotter. And then I ll see myself in a photo and be like, ‘Oh God, I ve got to do something about this!’

“Truthfully, the best photo I ve ever seen of myself was taken on Google Earth. That s the distance I m happy with being photographed. But again, this is all part of my strategy. In about two years, PEOPLE magazine is going to be running a piece like, Holy s—, when did he get so hot?’ ”

Though Corden admits that something needs to change in order to be named the “Sexiest Man Alive,” he fully understands the difference between a man being sexy and a man being hot … which is key!

“I struggle to see how a man who spends two hours at a gym every day is sexy to a woman,” he writes. “What you really want is a guy who knows how to cook a lasagna, will eat it with you and not judge you for going back for more.”

David Beckham is PEOPLE's 2015 Sexiest Man Alive

For more on the Sexiest Man Alive – and to see who else made the cut – pick up the new issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday

Adding, “You’re looking at a man whose favorite compliment I ve ever had from someone on the street was ‘You remind me of a fat Matt Damon.’ I was bouncing around the room when I got told that, like, ‘Yes! Thank you! And you re kind of right!’ ”

Though the happily married, father-of-two has a few years to master his “Sexy Man” image, Corden seems to know exactly what women want … besides a man that can cook!

“A few jokes, an opinion on something and an ability to talk and listen, in my experience, that s what a woman really wants,” Corden writes. “As a father of two young children, I ve found that if you are holding your child, your sexiness goes up a minimum of 25 percent.”

Check out “People s Sexiest Man Alive 2015: 30 Years of Sexy” on Lifetime Television Network on Wednesday at 9pm ET/PT.

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