Ireland Baldwin is finally feeling like herself again.
The 19-year-old model took to Instagram on Tuesday to share an important message with her fans, revealing that she suffered from anxiety and has “relearned what it truly means and what it feels like to be truly present.”
“There are so many moments I have taken for granted in this life due to my lack of presence,” she wrote as the caption to the post, which includes a photo of a beach at sunset. “I have overlooked countless blessings and opportunities to start fresh, and I have neglected, manipulated, and lied to the people I hold dear to my heart, but more importantly, to myself. It hasn’t been until recent months that I relearned what it truly means and what it feels like to be fully present. For the longest time, I lost compassion towards almost everything i previously cared for and I was so lost in darkness, that I could hardly hold a real conversation with another human being long enough before I was due to have an anxiety attack and find my way out of it.”
She went on to thank those who have supported her and express her excitement about this “new beginning.”
“I just wanted to take a moment to show gratitude to everyone who has continued to stand by my side through all that took place and through all that life will continue to throw at me. I’m proud to say I will not be knocked down and alone next time around. I have never been so supported and felt so loved in my life,” she said. “I’m happy to say I feel like Ireland again and it’s amazing that I can actually say that because it’s been a really long time and I was starting to forget what she was like.”
“I love you all for making me feel beautiful and supported every single day!” she concluded.
On April 13, Baldwin announced via Twitter that she had checked herself into a drug and alcohol facility treatment in Malibu, California, for “emotional trauma,” saying that she “needed a breather” and some time to work on herself.
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She checked out of the rehab center three weeks later, and a source told PEOPLE at the time that she “will still participate in the facility’s programs.”