'I'm Gonna Check My S--- at the Door': Gwyneth Paltrow on How She and Chris Martin Made 'Conscious Uncoupling' Work

Paltrow explains how she and Chris Martin remained a family after the divorce

Photo: Colin Young-Wolff/Invision/AP

Gwyneth Paltrow is sharing the keys to her very amicable “conscious uncoupling” from Chris Martin.

“Time is an important in it as well,” says Paltrow in the latest issue of Red magazine. “We had broken up a year before we announced it, so we would have this time to work through everything.”

Following their split, Gwyneth tells the U.K. magazine she learned how to “press the ‘override’ button’ whenever she was feeling angry or heartbroken. This made it easier to focus on putting their children–Apple, 11, and Moses, 10– first.

“If you want to put your children first then why are you slagging your husband off in front of them?” she says. “So we really tried that [and] that meant I’m gonna check my s— at the door, and I’m just going to focus on all the reasons that I love you.”

While that’s easier said than done, it was what they decided to do. “I have to say it wasn’t the outcome we were hoping for, but it was our outcome and we’ve done the best that we can,” she says.

Paltrow and the Coldplay frontman announced their separation in March 2014 after 10 years of marriage. Since then, they have remained close–Paltrow once said Martin was “like her brother“–and continue spend time with the children together, like at Thanksgiving.

“We’re a family,” she told Matt Lauer on Today in March. “Even though we’re not in a romantic relationship, we’re a true family and we like to do things to reinforce that we’re a family for the children and for each other.”

Paltrow is currently dating American Horror Story co-creator Brad Falchuk.