Demi Lovato Talks About 'Dark and Deep' Struggles With Addiction and Eating Disorder

The X Factor judge went to rehab in 2010

Demi Lovato admits there was a time when, just like a lot of other pop stars, she insisted she didn’t want to be a role model for her younger fans.

“I used to say that too. That was my excuse to do whatever the f–k I wanted and not give a s t about what other people thought,” the X Factor judge tells Entertainment Weekly. “Then I ended up going through some stuff. I realized I’m never going to escape the fact that I’m in the public eye, so I might as well do the best I can.”

The “stuff” Lovato, 21, is referring to is a 2010 stint in rehab as she battled drug and alcohol addiction as well as an eating disorder and cutting.

The Disney star was in the middle of a world tour with the Jonas Brothers when her “emotional and physical” issues spiraled out of control.

“When I was in treatment, I honestly thought my career was over,” she admits. “But when I came out of treatment, I had more supportive fans than ever.”

Lovato, whose book of daily affirmations, Staying Strong: 365 Days a Year is out Nov. 19, is now working on her memoir and admits she’s struggling with just how much she should reveal about that troubled time in her life.

“I’m battling with internal thoughts on how honest I should be,” she says. “Yes, I’ve been very honest, but if people really knew how dark and deep my struggles got – not just with my eating disorder but with drugs and alcohol – they’d be really shocked. But I’ll most likely end up saying everything. Maybe it’ll help other people in the industry who are headed down the wrong path.”

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