Celebrity Colton Haynes Reveals He Lost His Virginity at 13 — to a Girl 'and' a Guy In a revealing chat with SiriusXM host Andy Cohen, Colton Haynes opened up about his coming out journey — including the very first time he had sex By Dave Quinn Dave Quinn Instagram Twitter Dave Quinn is an Editor for PEOPLE, working across a number of verticals including the Entertainment, Lifestyle and News teams. He joined in 2006 as a Writer/Reporter where he became known for his Bravo and Broadway exclusives across print and digital. Dave is the author of the No. 1 New York Times best-selling book, Not All Diamonds and Rosé: The Inside Story of the Real Housewives from the People Who Lived It. He's appeared on many broadcasts including ABC's Good Morning America, Bravo's Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen, E!'s Daily Pop, NBC's New York Live and PEOPLE's own Reality Check, as well as a number of podcasts like Bitch Sesh, Everything Iconic, Watch What Crappens, Hot Off the Mess, Mention It All, and PEOPLE Every Day. Prior to working at PEOPLE, Dave was the chief Theater Reporter for NBC New York and co-host of Entertainment Weekly's acclaimed TV Recaps series. People Editorial Guidelines Published on June 13, 2017 01:19 PM Share Tweet Pin Email Colton Haynes spent years living in the closet, hiding his sexual orientation from the public. So now that the 28-year-old Rough Night star is living an openly gay life, he’s not holding anything back! In a revealing chat with Andy Cohen on the Watch What Happens Live host’s SiriusXM network Radio Andy, Haynes opened up about his coming out journey — including the first time he had sex. Haynes first came out as gay when he was 14, though had lost his virginity the year before when he was in eighth grade — first to a woman and then to a man. “I lost my virginity at 13, to a girl and a guy,” Haynes said, explaining the female was 15 at the time and the male, 16. “I’ve never said that before.” While the actor later admitted he had experienced threesomes in the past, he was quick to clarify this wasn’t one of them. “It wasn’t a three-way. It was separate instances,” he said. He added “Everyone participated. It was a real first time.” Back then, Haynes found himself moving around a lot — first in Florida and then to Texas. As a result, he changed high schools a few times and found himself in a pattern of coming out and then going back into the closet. Eventually he’d move to Hollywood to pursue acting and find himself back in the closet again. “I was literally told from the day that I moved to Los Angeles that I could not be gay because I wouldn’t work,” he explained. “I was with my management team and a team of people who literally told me I couldn’t be this way.” Haynes’ management team even went as far to set the actor up with girls or float fake relationships to the press. “I was rumored to date Lauren Conrad for six months because they were angling a story,” he said. “And then I dated every other young person which, of course, I didn’t date. They knew the whole time. It was horrible.” Ben Gabbe/Getty The entire time, Haynes was battling anxiety. It got so bad it forced the star to leave his role on Arrow. “I literally couldn’t go to work because I would faint. I’d start sweating and shaking. I became agoraphobic and there was all this stuff going on at the time, and it really was hard,” Haynes said. FROM PEN: Andy Cohen’s Top 5 Most Revealing Plead the Fifth Answers Coming out in 2016 changed everything. “I felt like I lost 150 lbs. after,” he said. “I was so tired of not being myself — having to lower my voice for certain things and having to not dress the way I wanted to dress and just do all this stuff. And it was life-changing.” Now, Haynes is happily living an out life — and has even found love with celebrity florist Jeff Leatham. The two are engaged to be married. “I am locked down and ready for marriage,” Haynes gushed to Cohen.