25 Best Celeb Quotes This Year
"I feel so embarrassed."
– Miley Cyrus, apologizing before the release of her back-baring Vanity Fair photo, to PEOPLE
– Project Runway season four winner Christian Siriano, on everything
"This song is for the emotionally retarded. You might know a few people who fall into that category. God knows I do."
– Madonna, performing in Boston after the announcement of her divorce from Guy Ritchie
"You know, they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pitbull? Lipstick."
– Former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin, introducing herself to voters at the Republican National Convention
"I sit there and I'll look back and I'm like: I'm a smart person. What the hell was I thinking?"
– Britney Spears, reflecting on her erratic behavior from the beginning of the year, in MTV's documentary For the Record
"Welcome to the makeup sex."
– Host Jon Stewart, acknowledging the end of the writers strike as he opened the 80th Annual Academy Awards
"For my Blake, my Blake incarcerated."
– Amy Winehouse, giving a shoutout to her jailed husband Blake Fielder-Civil, as she swept the Grammy Awards
"I'm f---ing Matt Damon."
– Sarah Silverman, in her Emmy Award winning mock video for boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel, on the 5th anniversary of his late night show
Ben Affleck: "Thank God my daughter is too young [to understand]."
Jimmy Kimmel: "Well, she's our daughter now."
– After Kimmel and Affleck revealed their star-studded revenge video – "I'm F–ing Ben Affleck" – on Sarah Silverman and Matt Damon
"I can snort you under the table."
– Elton John, bickering with a tipsy Lily Allen onstage, at the GQ Men of the Year Awards
"Even the airport-security guy in Canada asked me, 'So, is it true?' "
– Samantha Ronson, on the widespread curiosity about her relationship with Lindsay Lohan, to Harper's Bazaar
"I toot under the sheets, I spend a lot of money and I can belch the ABC's."
– Jessica Simpson, on what her boyfriends put up with, to PEOPLE
"If I can't get the girl, why don't I just tell her I'm John Mayer?"
– John Mayer, spoofing his songwriting abilities, on Funnyordie.com
"I just want to say, it's not bad to wear a promise ring, because not everyone, guy or girl, wants to be a slut."
– Jordin Sparks, addressing the night's digs about the Jonas Brothers and their promise rings, while presenting at the MTV Video Music Awards
"I won't go to a club now for less than $100,000."
– Spencer Pratt, on how he makes a living courtesy of his Hills fame, to David Letterman
"Maybe you're the problem."
– David Letterman, suggesting to Lauren Conrad a possible reason why she has issues with all of her Hills friends, on Late Show
"She's just fat!"
– Felicity Huffman, squashing the pregnancy rumors surrounding her Desperate Housewives' costar Eva Longoria Parker, to PEOPLE