May 17, 2016 01:00 PM

If you know what’s good for you, you’ll avoid these unorthodox, awkward and downright hurtful proposal methods.

“My grandmother was proposed to in this way, sometime in the ’40s: As she is sitting shotgun in the car with a guy she considered a friend, he says to her, out of nowhere, ‘Rita, what I’d really like to have with you is something along the lines of a permanent franchise.’ His offer was declined.”


“I had gotten the ring and was thinking about the logistics of where in our apartment I could hide it so she wouldn’t stumble across it. I wanted to make a big presentation of the whole thing and was trying to come up with a good plan. My mom was with me at the time because I value her opinions when it comes to jewelry, and she said, ‘You know, sometimes it’s more memorable to make an average moment special, than to make an event out of it.’ So when I got home, I started changing clothes, and the GF came home. I dropped down on one knee and gave her the box. She lost it. That’s when I realized I had not yet put on pants.”

“When I was younger I worked at a bowling alley. Some guy proposed to this girl in front of the arcade. She said no.”

“A guy I knew – a really stupid guy – got his girlfriend a diamond ring as a birthday present, not intending any larger message. She unwrapped it and said, ‘Oh, of course I will!” He went through with it rather than deal with the awkwardness. The engagement didn’t last.”

“My parents on a walk to get snacks. My dad, wearing tattered lazy-Sunday clothes, says, ‘So let’s go get your ring.’ ‘What?’ ‘Well, we’re getting married, right?’ 31 years married.”

A guy wanted to propose to his girlfriend at Disney World, which is very common, usually in front of the castle, usually with staff involved for pictures and stuff. But no, this genius, this man of men, decided he had to step it up a notch and decided to do it on Splash Mountain. At the peak. Right before the drop. Aaaand he dropped the ring.”


“A guy I knew proposed at his brother’s wedding reception. Not quite the same, but I still thought it was a jerk move. She said yes, too, but recanted it a few days later.”

“My dad’s method was pretty bad. He was supposed to pick my mom up from work (on his motorcycle), and he was late. She was pissed and chewed him out the entire way home. When they got home, he was fuming, and said something along the lines of: ‘You want to know why I’m fucking late? Here!’ and slammed down the box with the ring in it.”


“My boyfriend of 4 years and I went on a holiday together. I was still very in love with him at that moment, and I thought he had the same feelings. The 3rd night I had a bad fever and told him he could go out if he wanted because I was going to bed at like 7 p.m. So he went to the hotel bar. I woke up at 4:00-ish all sweaty and took a shower, and he was still not back from drinking, so I went to the hotel bar (this was a big hotel so it was still open and pretty crowded) and saw my boyfriend being a little to comfortable with some college-age girl. I asked a waitress if she had seen him do anything, and she told me they had been making out dozens of times. I was too shocked/hurt that moment for the confrontation, so I promised myself to break up with him as soon as we got home. Three days later, while we were at another hotel, he asked me to marry him.”


“My wife says that the way I proposed was a traumatic experience, and she wishes that I had done something a bit different. She was six months pregnant with our first child. We were living in our first shared crappy apartment getting ready to go to a fair. (Why I didn’t do it at the fair or something, I couldn’t tell you). What I did do was morosely tell her that there was something we needed to talk about. I sat her down and proceeded to tell her there was something bugging me in the relationship, and the ‘way I see it there is only one way to fix it … Will you marry me?’ She genuinely thought that I was breaking up with her and leaving her stuck with a child to raise on her own before those last words came out. She started crying and eventually hit me, then said yes. I am a lucky man to have her. I just wish I could have asked in a little different way!”

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