10 Best Celeb Quotes This Week

Jennifer Aniston passes off adoption rumors onto Adam Sandler, plus more from Charlie Sheen, Natalie Portman and other stars

Columbia

"No, I'm not adopting a Mexican child. Adam Sandler adopted four last week and that never even got mentioned."
– Jennifer Aniston, using her Just Go with It costar to deflect adoption rumors, on The Ellen DeGeneres Show

Matt Baron/BEImages

"BTW, two wars are in an endless state of sorrow. Egypt about burned to the ground, and all you people care about is my bullsh--....?"
– Charlie Sheen, on the media storm surrounding his most recent troubles, including returning to rehab, via text to E! News

Eric Charbonneau/Le Studio

"We have to have playdates with the kids!"
– An expectant Natalie Portman, sharing the joys of motherhood with fellow new mom Nicole Kidman, on the SAG Awards red carpet

Kevin Mazur/Getty;

"We are done now. I think four [kids] to look after is plenty. We aren't like Angelina and Brad."
– Heidi Klum, who's still hot for husband Seal – but not more children, to the UK Daily Mail

CNN; Inset: PictureGroup

"Let me explain, you foreigners: You do not punch Anderson Cooper – you punch Snooki. That's how we do it here. You keep your dirty hands off our silver fox."
– Jimmy Kimmel, stepping up for the CNN correspondent who was attacked by a group of protestors while reporting in Egypt, on his late show

Carlos Diaz/INF

"A little too much situation here."
– Modern Family's Sofia Vergara, joking about the low-cut neckline of her SAG Awards dress, to PEOPLE

David M. Russel

"That was more skin than I show at the beach. I'm usually the girl in the long poncho."
– Rachael Ray, on wearing a skimpy red dress designed by DWTS costume designer Randall Christensen on her show, to PEOPLE

Ramey

"Step away from the baby room."
– Carey Hart, coming to his expectant wife Pink's rescue after she unsuccessfully tried to put together a crib, on Twitter

Steve Granitz/WireImage

"No one has ever thanked their in-laws on public television. I had friends coming up to me, in the middle of the ceremony after my speech saying, 'You realize you ruined it for all of us.'"
– SAG Award winner Julianna Margulies, who thanked her husband's parents for producing "a superior person" during her acceptance speech, on Ellen

"I'm the real Mark Zuckerberg!"
– Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg, coming face to face with Jesse Eisenberg, who portrayed him in The Social Network, on Saturday Night Live
Last Week's 10 Best Celeb Quotes >