10 Best Celeb Quotes This Week

Let's talk about sex with Ryan Phillippe and Bradley Cooper, plus more from Tina Fey, Pete Wentz and other stars

01 of 10

"Well, actually Mom, that means I am a dad that they'd like to have sex with."
Ryan Phillippe, recalling how he explained to his mom why people call him a D.I.L.F, on The Ellen DeGeneres Show

02 of 10
John Shearer/WireImage

"In the beginning I was like 'Oh yes, I'm going to Harvard Business School...and I'll be at the Four Seasons down the street.' And they were like, 'Girl, you're going to be in the dorms.'"
Tyra Banks, on her Ivy League wake-up call, on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon

03 of 10
Lloyd Bishop/NBC

"From a comedian's standpoint, and my monologue writers', thank you…It kind of wrote itself: balls, shaft, holes, foursomes…"
Jimmy Fallon, expressing his gratitude first-hand to Tiger Woods for supplying much of his material for Late Night

04 of 10
Roger Wong/INF; Inset: Jordan Strauss/Getty

"It's ridiculous. I remember watching CNN once, and on the bottom ticker it said something like, 'Beyoncé no longer wants to be called Bootylicious.'"
Scream 4's Neve Campbell, who can think of more weighty issues that deserve news coverage, to Health

05 of 10
Jennifer Graylock/AP, Everett

"I was having sex with Michael Ian Black in a sports shed in Wet Hot American Summer."
Bradley Cooper, explaining why he missed his graduation from the Actors Studio Drama School, on Inside the Actors Studio

06 of 10
Inset: Kevork Djansezian/Getty

"The fact is, I am a troll."
Jon Cryer, finally breaking his silence after being called an evil creature by his former Two and a Half Men costar Charlie Sheen, on Conan

07 of 10
Michael Tran/FilmMagic

"The woman that did my hair butchered it. i hate it. thanks for pointing out how much you all hate it, too. helpful."
Pink, Tweeting back to her followers who dissed her new haircut

08 of 10
Splash News Online

"Kids are definitely the boss of you. Anyone who will barge into the room while you are on the commode is the boss of you. And when you explain to them that you're on the commode and that they should leave but they don't? That's a high-level boss."
Bossypants author Tina Fey, revealing the head honcho in her life – 5-year-old daughter Alice, to InStyle

09 of 10
Bauer Griffin; Inset: Everett

"[It] was the best five-week workout plan of my life. Nothing like a live chainsaw to motivate you to run faster."
Renée Zellweger, who starred with fellow workout buff Matthew McConaughey in the 1994 horror sequel The Return of Texas Chainsaw Massacre, to PEOPLE

10 of 10
X17, Gilbert Flores/Celebrity Photo

"It's like the one time on earth I'm like, 'Thank god Charlie Sheen exists.'"
Pete Wentz, grateful for the media storm that overshadowed his split from wife Ashlee Simpson, on Ryan Seacrest's KIIS-FM morning show
10 Best Celeb Quotes Last Week

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