While Jana Kramer is all for turning to her fans for suggestions on motherhood, she is also a believer in don’t ask, don’t tell.
The 33-year-old country singer and actress chatted with PEOPLE Saturday at Chicago’s Windy City Smokeout Festival, opening up about life as a working mom to Jolie Rae, her 17-month-old daughter with Mike Caussin, whom Kramer separated from last August.
“The other night, I put her in bed with us because I was like, ‘I need sleep. [But] that’s going to start a really bad habit,’ ” recalls Kramer, who recently teamed up with Little Black Dress Wines — in collaboration with Dress for Success — to host the nonprofit’s client Keisha Wilson backstage at her Chicago tour stop.
Continues the mother of one and former Dancing with the Stars contestant, “I’ve talked to a few of my mom friends who say they can’t break the habit. So I just let her cry it out one night.”
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Looking for any bit of advice that could help Jolie – and therefore Mommy – get a better night’s sleep, Kramer posted on Instagram to ask her fans for their suggestions.
“One of the fans said to put lavender oil on the bottoms of her feet, so I did and she slept through the night,” Kramer shares. “I don’t even know if it was that or she was just so tired from not sleeping the three days before, but [I use] lavender oil every night now.”
While Kramer really appreciates such helpful advice, she — like many celebrity moms — has already faced her fair share of mommy shamers. “I know everyone has an opinion; everyone has a right to an opinion,” she says.
But she finds it irritating when haters make comments and critiques on matters that she hadn’t welcomed opinions on in the first place. “What frustrates me is when they think they know something better,” Kramer says. “Unwarranted advice is not what moms want.”
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Nevertheless, Kramer finds the exchanging of welcomed back-and-forth feedback with her fellow moms to be very encouraging.
“It’s really nice, and I feel like it’s another way of moms being able to help [other] moms, encourage them,” she explains, giving a shout out to stay-at-home-moms by saying they do “the hardest work” of all.
“And showing you can do it all,” Kramer adds. “You can be a great mom and a great businesswoman.”