By People Staff
Updated April 09, 1979 12:00 PM

Hume’s offertory

Britain’s Basil Cardinal Hume, 56, was one of the few non-Italians reportedly in contention last year for the papacy. His response at the time was, “It would be nice to be elected if you could resign the next day.” But the Archbishop of Westminster is a more aggressive competitor at squash. Uplifting his eyes while testing new YMCA courts in Romford, Essex, he was not seeking divine guidance but was just belting one—a little too high, to tell the truth.

Jagger jives

On his latest Rolling Stones hit album, Mick Jagger threw in a little disco beat but while visiting the recent Trinidad and Tobago carnival, he went calypso. Joining up with some 2,000 members of Hocus Pocus, one of the costumed “bands” that compete for top prize, Jagger and his island lady, Jerry Hall of Texas and Manhattan, weaved through the Port of Spain streets in a manner choreographically Caribbean but sartorially Polynesian punk. For once Mick wasn’t magic. Hocus Pocus lost.

Jordan toasts Shire

At the premiere party for Old Boyfriends in New York, Talia Shire was more interested in new ones: She asked a strolling tarot-card reader about her relationship with “John.” Did the recently separated actress mean John Frankenheimer, director of her upcoming Prophecy? “No,” insists a source, “there’s another ‘John.’ ” Meanwhile, Talia’s co-star, Richard Jordan, was free with his toasts: He plans to marry actress Blair Brown, “the love of my life,” or at least of his miniseries Captains and the Kings.

Earthy Angel

Cheryl Ladd never forgets that her roots are in Huron, S.Dak. So for her first ABC special she’ll return to McGovern country to show us the “sensible, salt-of-the-earth girl she really is,” as the promo phrases it. To prove that the blurbola doesn’t mean stick-in-the-mud, Cheryl winds up a rousing Seven Brides for Seven Brothers-type dance sequence, mud-slinging so enthusiastically with dancer Don Correia on the barnyard set that she had the stuff “in my hair, my ears and even in my mouth and teeth,” she wails. Not to worry: It was special guck whipped up by the prop department, easily washed off and even tasty. The resident porkers, at any rate, ate it up.

Rogers folds

“Know when to hold ’em/Know when to fold ’em,” sings Kenny Rogers in his No. 1 country LP, The Gambler. So while comic Dick Smothers, kibitzed by a smiling spectator, blew some of the ersatz loot provided for guests at the Vegas-style bash United Artists Records threw for Kenny in Manhattan, the bearded singer raked in $2 million in funny money, then folded early—off to D.C. to sing to the highest roller of all, Jimmy Carter.

Cummings’ goings

Splashy, celeb-crammed parties like the one Los Angeles mobile-home-park millionaire George Gradow threw in his Pasadena mansion to kick off the Easter Seal telethon are okay for some stars, but to Philip McKeon, 14, Alice’s TV son, and Quinn Cummings, 11, Family’s kid sister, it meant more to meet Easter Seal girl 7-year-old Seanette Thompson there. Muttered Cummings as the evening wore on: “This is the last time I wear a dress.”