April 08, 2002 12:00 PM

In 1954 AUDREY HEPBURN got cozy with the first of her two Oscars (for Roman Holiday) and actor-director Jean Hersholt, an Academy forefather.

Named Best Supporting Actress for 1999’s Girl, Interrupted, a stunned ANGELINA JOLIE made it to the podium and declared, “I’m surprised nobody’s ever fainted up here.”

Accepting an honorary Oscar in 1991, SOPHIA LOREN (a 1962 winner for Two Women) concluded her thanks in her native tongue: “Grazie America.”

“For eight minutes onscreen I should only get a little bit of him,” quipped Shakespeare in Love’s DAME JUDI DENCH in 1999 of the new man in her life.

Two years after her 1998 Oscar for L.A. Confidential, KIM BASINGER recalled wondering, “Uh, did I steal this from the bathroom?”

Upon winning for Johnny Belinda in 1949, JANE WYMAN kissed and told her first thought: “Did I or didn’t I put on my girdle tonight?”

Having won a second Oscar, for playing painter Paul Gauguin in 1956’s Lust for Life, ANTHONY QUINN shouted, “I’m going to be a director!”

In Oscar-esque gold pajamas, JULIE CHRISTIE won for 1965’s Darling and later asked Rex Harrison, “Why isn’t my name on it?”

Given a special award in 1960, BOB HOPE crowed, “I now have two Oscars. I’ll have my ears pierced tomorrow.”

Spanish director PEDRO ALMODOVAR compared having his All About My Mother named Best Foreign Film of 1999 to “a multiple orgasm.”

After his Best Actor win for Shine in 1997, GEOFFREY RUSH said he’d been “pretty certain” Billy Bob Thornton (Sling Blade) would get the Oscar.

His statuette for 2000’s Traffic “feels pretty good, really good,” said Best Supporting Actor BENICIO DEL TORO. “My plans are, like, to tour with it and show it to my dad. It’s great when you have people to enjoy it with.”

In 1989 JODIE FOSTER put a lip lock on her first Oscar (for The Accused). “He’s not going anywhere,” she said. “Prisoner of Jodie.”

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