The Kardashian-Jenner family does many things that we could never do. For example, wear a sheer top to our spouse’s work event, Snapchat ourselves cooking in our nude underwear, munch on Popeyes on a private jet or have our butts X-rayed on national TV.
Among this long and diverse list are a number of unique photo poses that look spectacular on the krew, but would surely have our friends texting us to make sure we didn’t Instagram them by mistake. Below, 16 of our favorite KarJenner-only pic positions.
1. The leg sandwich
Apparently, getting on the floor and sliding between someone’s legs during a black tie event is frowned upon unless you’re, like, a popular supermodel or something.
2. The squat
We actually have done this pose before, but we were in the middle of the woods without a bathroom and cameras were definitely not welcome.
3. The Captain Morgan with phantom barrel
It’s just like the drunk photos you take with your friends, except it’s Vogue-worthy and also not at all the same.
4. The tiny truck
A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on May 6, 2016 at 10:38pm PDT
When we do it, we’re “acting childish” and “need to vacate the toy store.” When Kylie does it, she gets more than a million likes.
5. The chest-to-chest
We saw this and decided it was a totally normal way to stand next to our sister, but further evidence (a.k.a. said sister’s WTF face) proved it is not.
6. The sand woman
A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash) on Jul 9, 2016 at 1:57pm PDT
Warning: Attempting this will result in a sand-filled bikini bottom.
7. The tongue out-of-cheek
Trust us: Your Facebook friends don’t want to see that, no matter how cute you and bae may be.
8. The skirt to the sky
A post shared by Kendall (@kendalljenner) on May 20, 2015 at 12:08pm PDT
Impressive and largely impossible to replicate.
9. The shower siren
Just don’t try it.
10. The classy crotch shot
A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on Sep 5, 2016 at 7:43am PDT
Be careful, this one can get risqué fast.
11. The full-on hand bra
Kris Jenner probably feels a little differently about this than your mom would.
12. The gratuitous jelly shot
A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash) on Jan 31, 2017 at 7:23pm PST
Your friends and family are truly not ready for that jelly.
13. The twisted sister
Oh, yes, we can vividly picture ourselves attempting this and ending up faceplanted on the ground.
14. The heels over head
We’re not saying we don’t do this when we’re hanging out with friends, we’re just saying it doesn’t end up on social media.
15. The bed lather
My mom always says to treat your skin like silk. In 💛 with @manukadr Cashmere Touch Cream… Enriched with a blend of oils, Purified Bee Venom and Manuka Honey, which makes skin feel like silk too. #ManukaAmbassador
A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash) on Feb 7, 2017 at 8:29am PST
“Just kneeling on my plush bed and delicately applying lotion.” — Said no one ever, besides Kourtney Kardashian.
16. The bird’s eye view
Something else we’ll never do? Celebrate reaching 42 million Instagram followers.