Christopher Polk/NBC/Getty
Lydia Price
May 03, 2017 01:55 PM

The Kardashian-Jenner family does many things that we could never do. For example, wear a sheer top to our spouse’s work event, Snapchat ourselves cooking in our nude underwear, munch on Popeyes on a private jet or have our butts X-rayed on national TV.

Among this long and diverse list are a number of unique photo poses that look spectacular on the krew, but would surely have our friends texting us to make sure we didn’t Instagram them by mistake. Below, 16 of our favorite KarJenner-only pic positions.

1. The leg sandwich

Billy Farrell/BFA/REX/Shutterstock

Apparently, getting on the floor and sliding between someone’s legs during a black tie event is frowned upon unless you’re, like, a popular supermodel or something.

2. The squat


A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash) on Feb 23, 2017 at 11:24am PST

We actually have done this pose before, but we were in the middle of the woods without a bathroom and cameras were definitely not welcome.

3. The Captain Morgan with phantom barrel


A post shared by Kendall (@kendalljenner) on Feb 22, 2017 at 9:58am PST

It’s just like the drunk photos you take with your friends, except it’s Vogue-worthy and also not at all the same.

4. The tiny truck

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on May 6, 2016 at 10:38pm PDT

When we do it, we’re “acting childish” and “need to vacate the toy store.” When Kylie does it, she gets more than a million likes.

5. The chest-to-chest


A post shared by Khloé (@khloekardashian) on Dec 26, 2016 at 6:41pm PST

We saw this and decided it was a totally normal way to stand next to our sister, but further evidence (a.k.a. said sister’s WTF face) proved it is not.

6. The sand woman

On a sand hill.

A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash) on Jul 9, 2016 at 1:57pm PDT

Warning: Attempting this will result in a sand-filled bikini bottom.

7. The tongue out-of-cheek


A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on May 24, 2015 at 12:45pm PDT

Trust us: Your Facebook friends don’t want to see that, no matter how cute you and bae may be.

8. The skirt to the sky

Alaia is even better in the wind

A post shared by Kendall (@kendalljenner) on May 20, 2015 at 12:08pm PDT

Impressive and largely impossible to replicate.

9. The shower siren

@violetgrey 🖤

A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on Feb 16, 2017 at 12:40pm PST

Just don’t try it.

10. The classy crotch shot

Wired 📷 Mert & Marcus

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on Sep 5, 2016 at 7:43am PDT

Be careful, this one can get risqué fast.

11. The full-on hand bra

gangs all here

A post shared by Kendall (@kendalljenner) on Apr 30, 2016 at 9:11pm PDT

Kris Jenner probably feels a little differently about this than your mom would.

12. The gratuitous jelly shot

I don't think you ready for this jelly

A post shared by Kourtney Kardashian (@kourtneykardash) on Jan 31, 2017 at 7:23pm PST

Your friends and family are truly not ready for that jelly.

13. The twisted sister


A post shared by Kylie (@kyliejenner) on Feb 1, 2017 at 1:18pm PST

Oh, yes, we can vividly picture ourselves attempting this and ending up faceplanted on the ground.

14. The heels over head

us kids

A post shared by Kendall (@kendalljenner) on Jul 25, 2016 at 12:51pm PDT

We’re not saying we don’t do this when we’re hanging out with friends, we’re just saying it doesn’t end up on social media.

15. The bed lather

“Just kneeling on my plush bed and delicately applying lotion.” — Said no one ever, besides Kourtney Kardashian.

16. The bird’s eye view

42 mil

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on Aug 8, 2015 at 10:07pm PDT

Something else we’ll never do? Celebrate reaching 42 million Instagram followers.

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