Shia LaBeouf is trying to learn from his past mistakes.
In the April issue of Esquire, the 31-year-old actor gave his first-sit down interview since his “mortifying” 2017 arrest — during which he went on a racist and expletive-laced tirade at police officers.
“What went on in Georgia was mortifying,” he remarked to Esquire, calling it a mixture of “white privilege and desperation and disaster.”
“I f—ed up,” he added.
At the time of his arrest, LaBeouf was charged with public drunkenness and disorderly conduct, although the former charge was later dropped. In October of that year, the actor pleaded no contest to a misdemeanor charge of obstruction. After footage of the incident was released online showing the actor’s foul-mouthed tantrum while resisting arrest, LeBeouf apologized for his behavior, calling the incident “a new low,” and added that he was “actively taking steps toward securing” sobriety.
LaBeouf also added that while his “public outbursts” might remind people of John McEnroe’s confrontational on-court attitude, “McEnroe was a master at his rage. I’m a buffoon.”
Continuing he explained, “My public outbursts are failures. They’re not strategic. They’re a struggling motherf—er showing his ass in front of the world.”
Although he knows it will be hard to redeem himself in the public eye, the actor is trying to “take ownership of my s—” and “learn from my mistakes.”
“I’ve got to look at my failures in the face for a while. I need to take ownership of my s— and clean up my side of the street a bit before I can go out there and work again, so I’m trying to stay creative and learn from my mistakes,’ he told Esquire.
“The truth is, in my desperation, I lost the plot,” he admitted.
The 31-year-old also spoke about his relationship with Kanye West, who asked the actor if he could have some of his clothes to use in a pop-up shop after rapping about how he wished “I dressed as fresh as Shia LaBeouf” on an outtake of Life of Pablo” track “No More Parties in L.A.”
“I took my mother to his concert. She is, of course, obsessed with Kanye West. He was a f—ing sweetheart to her,” the Transformers star said. “So I’m like, ‘Go for it, my guy. Take everything you want.’ And he did. He took all my f—ing clothes.”
But despite his admiration for West, LaBeouf revealed he hadn’t had any contact with the rapper since West’s hospitalization for exhaustion.
“I f—ing love Kanye West. He’s going through a lot. And I don’t know where he’s at or what he’s doing,” the actor said. “Me and him haven’t really been in contact since he blew up onstage and, you know, s— on me.”
The April issue of Esquire hits newsstands on March 20.