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Julia Roberts Reveals the Secret to Her Happy Marriage to Danny Moder: 'Kissing'

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For Julia Roberts, the key to a happy marriage starts at the lips.

The Oscar winner, who just celebrated her 48th birthday, tells Extra that the secret ingredient to her 13-year marriage to cinematographer Danny Moder is plenty of “kissing.”

The happy couple, who have three children together, got the chance to work with each other on their new film, Secret in Their Eyes. Roberts plays an investigator whose teenager daughter is brutally murdered, while Moder was the film’s cinematographer.

The actress says that she enjoyed having her husband’s company on set for such an intense role. “If we got to go to work together and go home together, all that work time, when you come home and ‘Oh, honey, how was your day?’ … We did all that in the day and in the car,” she explains. “So when we got home we got to put that all away, which was really delightful.”

But for Roberts, the part was so heavy that she wasn’t able to embody her character’s emotions the way she normally would. “In a funny way, I refused to overlap the thoughts,” she says. “Obviously my creative process you normally draw on your personal emotions and relate it to your own life, and this is just something I thought, I can’t do that, it’s not worth it to try and create unimaginable thoughts in my mind. I just had to keep it separate.”

When she’s not working, Roberts chooses to keep things low-key. For her birthday on Oct. 28, she says, “I had a very nice morning with my family and went out to breakfast with my husband, and all my girlfriends came over and we played mahjong all day.”

At home, she’s busy with her twins Phinnaeus and Hazel, 10, and her son Henry, 8. “They love playing soccer, my daughter just had her last basketball game yesterday.” When they’re not playing sports, Roberts says, “It’s a lot of school work. School is not the easy ride it was when I was in fifth grade, it’s intense.”

Secret in Their Eyes hits theaters Nov. 20.