Whitney Houston is still tempted by drugs, but instead of surrendering to the urge she relies on a higher power to see her through.
“Don’t think I don’t have desires for it,” the Grammy winner admitted during the second part of her interview on The Oprah Winfrey Show Tuesday. “It takes me a minute to cleanse … I have to pray it away.”
On Monday’s show, Houston told Winfrey that at times she was a heavy user of marijuana and rock cocaine. On Tuesday’s show, she said that these days she occasionally will have a drink, but “no weed, no coke.”
She takes things “one day at a time,” and “if I get weak, I know who I can turn to,” she said. “I know God loves me.”
Houston, 46, also said God gave her the courage to leave what she described as an emotionally abusive 14-year marriage to Bobby Brown. Her husband “did not want me to leave,” she said. But she prayed to God, “if you give me one day of strength, I will go out that door and I will not look back.”
That day came in 2006, when she told Brown she was going out for sugar and milk but instead hopped on a plane for Los Angeles. Before that, she said, she moved their daughter, Bobbi Kristina, in with her brother and sister-in-law, who cared for the child during fifth and sixth grades, “while I just tried to get it all together.”
Change Daughter’s Life
Houston said she needed to remove her daughter from Brown because she had seen enough, witnessing a time when Brown spat on her. Houston tried to explain to her daughter. “I said, ‘But it’s all right.’ She said, ‘No, it’s not. No, it’s not.’ ”
When Houston moved Bobbi Kristina to live with her in Los Angeles, the girl was “very angry” and didn’t understand why she had to be separated from her father. But Houston said she didn’t want her exposed to Brown’s unfaithfulness. “I can’t let her think this is love,” she said.
Houston said she “kept knocking on that door” and “telling her I loved her,” and Bobbi Kristina eventually witnessed her father with other women and making promises he didn’t keep. “She said, ‘No. Divorce him. Let him go,’ ” recalls Houston. Houston and Brown divorced in 2007.
Jackson’s Death ‘Devastating’
Now 16, Bobbi Kristina is doing well, writing and singing. “She’s more and more like me every day,” says her mother. During a taping, Winfrey turned to Bobbi Kristina in the audience. “Words can’t explain how proud of I am [of my mother],” says the teen, adding that she plans to follow in Houston’s footsteps and pursue a singing career.
Winfrey also asked Houston about Michael Jackson, a friend for 20 years. “Devastating,” Houston said of his death, adding that she knew he had been on painkillers at one time.
While together in 2001 during the taping of Jackson’s 30th anniversary special, Houston said Jackson looked so sickly, “I was getting scared.” Admitting that she herself was so thin because of drug use, she said when she saw Jackson she thought, “I didn’t want to go that route.”