1 of 6
"Sarah Palin, she's a VILF, maybe. A vice president I'd like to ... fumble, fondle? I don't know."
– Host Russell Brand, complimenting the Republican candidate after first skewering the party
2 of 6
"Like a Jonas, with your promise ring next to mine"
– Katy Perry, changing the words to "Like a Virgin" to instead sing about the Jonas Brothers and their commitment to remain virgins until marriage
3 of 6
"I just want to say, it's not bad to wear a promise ring, because not everyone, guy or girl, wants to be a slut."
– Presenter Jordin Sparks, addressing the night's digs about the Jonas Brothers and their promise rings
4 of 6
"We were planning on having a Michael Jackson-Lisa Marie moment here, but we wanted to stay married next week."
– Pete Wentz appearing with wife Ashlee Simpson-Wentz and joking about Michael Jackson and then-wife Lisa Marie Presley's infamous VMA smooch
5 of 6
"Give it up for Rihanna and that beautiful outfit. Man, Chris Brown, lucky guy."
– Presenter Jamie Foxx about show-opener Rihanna and her boyfriend Chris Brown – even though they haven't publicly confirmed their romance
6 of 6
"Transformers was awesome!"
– Linkin Park deejay Joe Hahn, to presenter Shia LaBeouf, when winning the best rock video VMA