He’s ashamed and sorry and wished it never happened. But there’s one thing Chris Brown says he most certainly is not: forgetful.
In a detailed statement to PEOPLE, the singer clarifies what he calls incorrect reports – based on a clip of an interview with Larry King airing Wednesday night – about the events with Rihanna that led to his arrest:
“There have been reports on the Internet that I didn’t remember what happened that night with Rihanna. I want to try and set things straight.
“That 30 seconds of the interview they used of me was taken from a one hour interview during which that same question was asked something like four or five times – and when you look at the entire interview you will see it is not representative of what I said.
“The first four times – or however many times it was – I gave the same answer – which was that I didn’t think it was appropriate for me to talk about what happened that night. I said it was not right for me and it really wasn’t fair to Rihanna. The fifth time – or whatever it was – I just misspoke. I was asked, ‘Do you remember doing it?’ and I said, ‘No.’
“Of course I remember what happened. Several times during the interview, my mother said that I came to her right afterwards and told her everything. But it was and still is a blur. And yes, I still can’t believe it happened because it is not me or who I am, nor is what happened like anything I have ever done before.
“As I have said several times previously, I am ashamed of and sorry for what happened that night and I wish I could relive that moment and change things, but I can’t. I take full responsibility for my actions. What I have to do now is to prove to the world that this was an isolated incident and that is not who I am, and I intend to do so by my behavior now and in the future.”
Right after the incident, Brown tells PEOPLE, he was “distraught” and immediately “went to my mom on the same night and told [her] what happened and broke down.”
With the sentencing behind him, Brown is eager to start the court-ordered counseling sessions. “I want to find out what really transpired as far as me that night. I just want to talk to [the counselor], someone who has dealt with this and has an expertise because I think it would be helpful for me to learn how to channel [the anger] and understand my feelings.”
Brown says he’d never claim to have forgotten the assault or spend time defending his behavior: “I feel like there’s no need to make any excuses. At all.”
For the full interview with Brown and his mother – who calls hearing her son’s confession on the night of the assault "the most painful moment of my life" – pick up this week’s issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday