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"Bottom line, she's not a mere mortal like the rest of us. She's an Internet savvy, chicken-cooking Academy Award-winning octolingual something like that mother of two lifestyle guru…Thanks for making all of us look lazy."
– Jake Gyllenhaal, warmly introducing pal Gwyneth Paltrow at Elle's Women in Hollywood tribute, according to E! News
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"I'm always shocked by people who talk about not being middle-aged...People are always like, 'Thirty-five is not middle-aged.' I'm like, 'Double it.'"
– Julianne Moore, who turns 50 in December, to Allure
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"Steve Carrell, star of The Office, will hold your hand, say your name and simulate an orgasm. I couldn't begin to put a value on that…That's how he got his job on the Daily Show."
– Jon Stewart, auctioning off the talent of his former evening show correspondent to raise money during the live auction segment of Stewart's Night of Too Many Stars: An Overbooked Concert For Autism Education
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