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Expecting her first child (with Borat’s Sacha Baron Cohen): I’m due this winter. I’m so happy and excited!

Working with Andy Samberg: I say this with jealousy and respect—he has the best hair.

Playing the straight man amid a cast of crazy boys: It’s very frustrating. You just feel like screaming, “If I had a penis, I’d get to be funny too!”

The Aussie actresses (like Nicole Kidman and Cate Blanchett) thriving in Hollywood: First of all, we have a great state-funded drama-school system. Second, we can do the accent—I grew up watching American shows like The Brady Bunch. And third, we look great in a bikini!


Hairspray’s Amanda Bynes can thank her father’s stage fright for paving her way to Hollywood. “My dad took a stand-up class at the Comedy Store, but he got nervous and couldn’t do it. I said, ‘I want to try,’ so he found a kid’s comedy camp, and I loved it. That’s how the producers of a Nickelodeon show saw me,” says Bynes, now 21. So, was Dad thrilled? “Actually, he’s a retired dentist and always wanted me to be a hygienist,” says the actress. “He still throws floss in my purse all the time!”

“She’s not shy. And she’s very affectionate …. I’m like, ‘Honey, my parents are watching'”

—CHARLIE SHEEN, on fiancée Brooke Mueller

FREE ASSOCIATION with KEVIN NEALON, whose series Weeds (the second season) is now out on DVD …

Playing a pothead: I haven’t let my parents watch Weeds. I do things on that show that would shame the family.

A celebrity I’d get stoned with in real life: Brad Pitt. [We’d talk about] what’s it like being with Angelina Jolie and, like, do you still check out other women? Then maybe we’d compare notes on being a sex symbol.

I confess I … have a bunion on my left foot. I’m used to seeing it, but when other people do, they almost throw up.

Having a 6-month-old son with wife Susan Yeagley: We’re hands-on parents. It’s us and only us that drop him off at daycare and choose the nanny.

Worst nickname ever: Poop head—that’s a bad one. I also had a soccer coach call me Nylons.