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Scotched Tape

The last time Yoko Ono went public with one of her home movies, which included scenes of John before his death, the four-minute film was aired on ABC’s 20/20 by Barbara Walters, no less, and proved a ratings grabber. So how come Yoko’s latest film is being broadcast on a New York cable station, introduced by local talk show hostess Nikki Haskell? One reason: The seven-minute tape is probably too risqué for commercial TV. It includes scenes of John and Yoko in bed—and not just dozing. It’s not Yoko, of course, who’s bashful about the release. In her new album, Season of Glass, just out, a song titled No. No. No. begins with four gunshots, then Yoko screaming.

The Amazing Shrinking Superman

Donning tights and a cape in phone booths did little for actor Kirk Alyn, the first screen Superman (he appeared in the late-’40s serial). “I was typed and couldn’t get a job for a long time,” says Alyn, 71. In fact, he had long since flown the showbiz coop when the current Superman producers called to offer a cameo. Alas, Alyn could have used his old Man of Steel threads, which would have been more resistant to the editor’s scissors. His lines were cut and he flashed on and off the screen faster than a speeding bullet.

Sour Brakes

She became an unwitting celebrity when Bendix chairman Bill Agee said her lofty rank in the Detroit company had nothing to do with “a personal relationship we have.” She resigned, she job-hunted and now Mary Cunningham, 29, has found a niche as a vice-president for strategic planning and project development for Seagram & Sons. Her first project concerned marketing wines. Back in the U.S. after vineyard-hopping in Europe, Cunningham allowed that France, Italy and Germany sure beat Motown. And, she added, “Grapes are a lot more interesting than brakes.”

Rossi’s Bon Voyage

How does Love Boat lure all those top stars? It’s not the glamor but the moola. On about the fifth try, Love Boat’s producers finally snagged Robert Walden, who plays Lou Grant’s answer to Carl Bernstein. Walden’s episode will toss him together with prime price talents Tanya Tucker, Douglas Fairbanks Jr., Carol Channing and Robert Guillaume. MTM production company president Grant Tinker was not happy about the deal, according to Walden. “What are you doing a Love Boat for?” Tinker griped. “They always put them on opposite our shows.” Walden answered, “Grant, if you will pay me half what they are paying me, I won’t do it.” Well, Walden’s doing it.

No Battered Horses

Klinton Spilsbury, who plays the title role in the new Legend of the Lone Banger, says the American Humane Association was just nagging when it claimed some horses were abused during the filming. (The AHA charges they were felled by banned trip wires.) “Every time I would look for the lady who was in charge of combing my hair,” he argues, “she would be over combing Silver’s tail or bleaching it white or whatever. Those horses were better taken care of than we were.”


•When ex-Iranian hostage L. Bruce Laingen was named Father of the Year, diplomatic division, by the National Father’s Day Committee, he said the nomination had drawn an objection from one family member, but fortunately not one of his three children. “My wife said to me, ‘How can you possibly be Father of the Year?’ ” said Laingen. ” ‘You weren’t even here last year!’ ”

•Rod Steiger is going through a “Heroes of the ’30s” phase. Having played Mussolini, he now wants to give Einstein, Stalin and Hemingway a shake. He’s already researched Einstein, and finds the father of relativity a quantum jump more fascinating than his formulas: “He invented the phrase ‘Where the action is,’ and he was the first hippie. He wore long hair and jeans, but never bothered with underwear.”